GEORGE Quotes From Captain Underpants: The First Epic Movie

Below is a collection of the most memorable and amusing GEORGE quotes from the epic adventure of Captain Underpants: The First Epic Movie.

GEORGE Quotes on Humor and Silliness

“Foot! Foot! Ow!”
“Punch, punch! Punch, punch!”
“Wait, what? Why are you always sneaking dolphins into the movie?”
“I don’t have nothing against dolphins, it just didn’t happen!”
“Quiet five, quiet five.”
“Oh, that would be so cool! Okay, wait, let’s do it. Let’s try it. Oh, I would be Fluffy Toiletnose.”
“This is so good! I wanna change mine. I’d be Buttcheeks von Stinkelsberg.”
“You mean, other than your name?”
“Are you kidding me? That’s almost as funny as my hair back in kindygarten! Remember that afro?”
“Uranus!”
“Why does one person have so much lip balm?”
“Wow. He is super dumb.”
“Whoops.”
“Yeah, no kidding. I mean, why were we even worried… about that whole classroom thing in the first place?”
“Big plans tonight, Mr. Krupp?”
“Did you just pull that out of the garbage can?”
“Is this two-ply or one-ply?”
“Was that hi-def? ‘Cause you could really tell that’s us.”
“Eww. They like each other.”
“What are you talking about? Adults don’t like-like other adults.”
“Oh, dear old whoopee cushion. You will sing once again.”
“I was kinda hoping that we appealed to a slightly cooler demographic.”
“You said “Do something”!”
“What do you think? I got it out of a cereal box! I’m warning you. If you don’t do what we say, you’re going to get really sleepy!”
“I don’t know! Why are we floating?”
“I don’t know. I honestly didn’t think that would happen.”
“I don’t know. I just say the first thing that comes to my mind with great authority. You are now a chicken.”
“This is hilarious!”
“Oh, goodness. Grandpa, you did it again.”
“Not So Cheery O’s?”
“I gotta say, this has not been the funnest snoop.”

GEORGE Quotes on Friendship and Partnership

“Yeah. But how do we get to him without Poopypants seeing us?”
“…that we can only show it using a technology known as… Flip-O-Rama! Take it away, Harold.”
“Fine, all right. Let’s just keep going.”
“Yep, positive.”
“What happened to the Flip-O-Rama?!”
“Hey, Melvin! Take that thing off your head. We gotta stop Poopypants!”
“Yeah, wait, wait. Listen. We apologize for making fun of your name. I mean, that was just wrong.”
“Come on! Listen, your problem isn’t that people laugh at you. Your problem is that you can’t laugh at yourself.”
“I’m sure we can think of something!”
“No! Harold!”
“Harold….”
“Right here, buddy.”
“Well, we have to think of something funny, okay?”
“Don’t you say that, Harold! Don’t you leave me!”
“Harold! Harold, we did it! Harold?”
“Captain Underpants! Fly over here so we can make you big again!”
“Oh, no, where’d he go?”
“I can’t reach!”
“What? What the… Why would you do that?! You just let the bad guy get away!”
“I can’t believe we made him.”
“I think we do. I mean, he’s a way bigger problem than Mr. Krupp ever was.”
“Yeah, I know. But just ’cause we’re in separate classes, doesn’t mean we can’t be friends…”
“Yeah. Hey, in fact, you know what? Let’s do a blood oath. But minus the blood. I don’t wanna see the blood. No blood.”
“No, that’s lame. Mmm-mmm.”
“Oh, no. What? No! That’s not sanitary. Can’t we just do a verbal declaration of friendship or something?”
“And I, George, accept the permanent rights… that Harold has given me to be his best friend forever… and the constitution of friends…”
“And the United States of America.”
“It’s done. All right, cool.”
“Clearly, we have.”
“We could fix that.”
“So that’s how we came to pull the rarest prank of all…”
“The prank… for good.”
“You know, it feels good to do something nice for Mr. Krupp.”
“Promise we’ll never do it again.”
“Once again, that brings our story to its happy conclusion.”
“Freeze! Hey, everybody! Wait one second. Hi, I’m George Beard, and this is my best friend, Harold Hutchins.”
“It’s okay. We got more ideas. See, Harold loves to draw and I love to tell stories. And this old guy looking angry right here, well, this is the worst principal in the world, Mr, Krupp.”
“Yeah, me too. And unfreeze.”
“Quiet fives.”
“Wow, That’s a lot of pranks.”
“Some of those must’ve been really hard to pull off.”
“Oh, that tiger was crazy!”
“All right.”
“So that’s why we do what we do. He’s left us no choice.”
“Our pranks and practical jokes are the last line of defense… against the injustice of our terrible principal.”
“Tree house?”
“Welcome to the world headquarters of Tree House Comix, Inc.”
“That’s how we became friends.”
“Hey, I’m George. You wanna hang out in my tree house after school?”
“Ever since then, we’ve created hundreds of comics in here. Like the Wrath of the Wicked Wedgie Woman.”
“But the all-time greatest superhero that we’ve ever created was… The Amazing Captain Underpants.”
“Hey, tell me what you think.”
“Mr. Hutchins, I gotta say… your drawings get better with every issue.”
“Good night, Harold.”
“Lay low? Look at our fellow children. Look upon their sad, miserable, pathetic faces. Come on, Harold. If you won’t do it for me and you won’t do it for you… do it for future generations. Save the first graders… the kindygarteners, the unborn… from a life of eternal boredom!”
“Best.”
“Well, that brings our story to its happy conclusion.”
“It was certainly shorter than we expected.”
“And good triumphed over evil once and for…”
“Hey, hey. Calm down. It’s not the end of the world. We’ll still be best friends. Just way down the hall from each other. What am I talking about? This is bad. Long distance relationships never work!”
“Okay, you’re right. No, you are right. I mean, if we get put in separate classes, it’s the end of the world as we know it.”
“Oh, I’ll tell you what we’re gonna do. First thing Monday morning, we’re getting that turtle.”
“It’s like we’re the same person and yet so, so different. I love it.”

GEORGE Quotes on Action and Adventure

“Okay, we have to stop him.”
“Oh, boy. Here goes nothing.”
“Freeze! (the movie pauses; to the viewers) The following sequence contains scenes… that are so intense, horrific, and violent…”
“Wait, what?”
“What happened to the Flip-O-Rama?!”
“We’re shrinking! Now, if we don’t laugh at something soon, we may never laugh again.”
“Well, we have to think of something funny, okay?”
“Anything?”
“Me neither.”
“More shrinkage!”
“Mostly potty humor. Poop, vomit, that kind of thing.”
“I know!”
“It feels so good to laugh!”
“Never underestimate the power of laughter, Poopypants!”
“Harold! Harold, we did it! Harold?”
“Help!”
“He has real superpowers!”
“I am so glad that we gave him that superpower!”
“Captain Underpants! Fly over here so we can make you big again!”
“Oh, no, where’d he go?”
“I can’t reach!”
“What? What the… Why would you do that?! You just let the bad guy get away!”
“Goodbye, Captain Underpants.”
“I don’t get it! I really thought breaking that ring would get rid of his powers!”
“Wait.”
“She’s been on hold for, like, the whole movie. Come on, come on.”
“Hello. (Anthrope wakes up) Thank you for holding. How can I help…”
“In association with…”
“All right, okay. So, a long, long, long, long time ago…”
“Underpanty World was a peaceful planet where everybody wore only underwear.”
“Until, it started to blow up for some reason.”
“Meanwhile, the leaders of Underpanty World, Big Daddy Long Johns and his wife Princess Pantyhose saved their baby by stretching his underwear really far and then they shot him into space.”
“And then he crashed on earth and he was raised by some nice fi… Dolphins?”
“Okay, fine.”
“But, the space baby grew up fast.”
“It’s so good. We should’ve done an origin issue ages ago.”
“You know, I’m not sure about the dolphins, though.”
“Freeze! Hey, everybody! Wait one second. Hi, I’m George Beard, and this is my best friend, Harold Hutchins.”
“It’s okay. We got more ideas. See, Harold loves to draw and I love to tell stories. And this old guy looking angry right here, well, this is the worst principal in the world, Mr, Krupp.”
“Oh, my goodness, did that really happen?”
“Yeah, me too. And unfreeze.”
“What is happening right now?”
“Do you think he fell asleep with his eyes open?”
“Wow! That’s an expensive door.”
“How? How do you know? Do you have any proof? I mean, this is a country of laws.”
“Wow, That’s a lot of pranks.”
“Some of those must’ve been really hard to pull off.”
“Oh, that tiger was crazy!”
“All right.”
“You see what we’re up against? And that’s just a typical day at Jerome Horwitz Elementary.”
“What’s going on, Tommy?”
“Poor kid.”
“Hold on a sec.”
“So that’s why we do what we do. He’s left us no choice.”
“Our pranks and practical jokes are the last line of defense… against the injustice of our terrible principal.”
“How’d you hear that, Melvin?”
“No one has to stand up for the Man. That’s the whole point of the Man. He stands up for himself, Melvin.”
“Oh, what?”
“Put the pen down, Mr. Krupp… or we’ll hypnotize you!”
“Forged from the molten plastic of Shandong, China. In the lowest floor of the darkest basement where only toy prizes dare be made, exists the most powerful items ever to be found in a box of Frosted Sugar Doodles, the Hypno-Ring.”
“What do you think? I got it out of a cereal box! I’m warning you. If you don’t do what we say, you’re going to get really sleepy!”
“When I snap my fingers, you will obey our every command.”
“Come on.”
“You are now the greatest superhero of all time… the amazing Captain Underpants!”
“It worked!”
“Wait, no!”
“Why?”
“Yeah, we should probably go get him.”
“Captain Underpants, wait!”
“Okay, listen, let’s not be punching people, though, because…”
“What?”
“No.”
“Where’d he go now?”
“Found him.”
“We gotta do something. I’ve got an idea.”
“Morning.”
“No!”
“Wait! No! Follow that gorilla!”
“Yeah! You are so good at operating a crane, Harold.”
“Yes!”
“Well, don’t worry about that. There’s no more evil villains around here.”
“That’s it! Now we know what turns him back and forth.”
“We should probably stop.”
“Okay, this is the street. Come on, come on. We’re almost there.”
“Drop it. No, get off. Gimme! That’s a bad dog.”
“There’s probably wild dogs in there.”
“Rabid rats.”
“Jars of plucked-out eyeballs.”
“Why’d you scream?”
“We probably shouldn’t snoop around.”
“Come on.”
“It’s impossible. That would never happen.”
“Which will never happen.”
“It’ll never happen. ‘Cause we control him now. And if ever gives us any trouble again, all we gotta do is snap our fingers… and “Tra-la-laa!” All of our problems go away.”
“Hey, Tommy. What’s going on?”
“No, you didn’t.”
“I don’t see a signature. Harold, do you see a signature?”
“See? Problem solved.”
“Quick, in here.”
“Definitely. Come on. Let’s turn him back into Krupp.”
“Yeah, well, we can’t have him wandering around looking like that.”
“Captain Underpants, get out here.”
“Come on. We’re almost there.”
“Principal Krupp. It’s time to go. Gotta wrap it up.”
“Wow, she’s still on hold.”
“Now hold on. Let me see that resume. It says here that you were a genius inventor?”
“Oh, this is bad. We just hired a maniac for a science teacher!”
“No, no, no. You need to stay here. Okay, you’re the principal, remember?”
“Pacific Ocean into chocolate.”
“Get rid of laughter?”
“I don’t like this. I mean, I don’t really understand it. But the stuff I am understanding seems genuinely bad to me.”

GEORGE Quotes on the Power of Laughter

“Come on! Listen, your problem isn’t that people laugh at you. Your problem is that you can’t laugh at yourself.”
“It feels so good to laugh!”
“Never underestimate the power of laughter, Poopypants!”
“We’re shrinking! Now, if we don’t laugh at something soon, we may never laugh again.”
“Well, we have to think of something funny, okay?”
“Anything?”
“Me neither.”

GEORGE Quotes on Comics and Storytelling

“Freeze! (the movie pauses; to the viewers) The following sequence contains scenes… that are so intense, horrific, and violent…”
“…that we can only show it using a technology known as… Flip-O-Rama! Take it away, Harold.”
“Wait, what? Why are you always sneaking dolphins into the movie?”
“I don’t have nothing against dolphins, it just didn’t happen!”
“Fine, all right. Let’s just keep going.”
“What happened to the Flip-O-Rama?!”
“It’s so good. We should’ve done an origin issue ages ago.”
“You know, I’m not sure about the dolphins, though.”
“Freeze! Hey, everybody! Wait one second. Hi, I’m George Beard, and this is my best friend, Harold Hutchins.”
“It’s okay. We got more ideas. See, Harold loves to draw and I love to tell stories. And this old guy looking angry right here, well, this is the worst principal in the world, Mr, Krupp.”
“Oh, my goodness, did that really happen?”
“Yeah, me too. And unfreeze.”
“You see what we’re up against? And that’s just a typical day at Jerome Horwitz Elementary.”
“That’s how we became friends.”
“Ever since then, we’ve created hundreds of comics in here. Like the Wrath of the Wicked Wedgie Woman.”
“But the all-time greatest superhero that we’ve ever created was… The Amazing Captain Underpants.”
“Hey, tell me what you think.”
“Mr. Hutchins, I gotta say… your drawings get better with every issue.”
“Well, that brings our story to its happy conclusion.”
“It was certainly shorter than we expected.”
“And good triumphed over evil once and for…”
“Was that hi-def? ‘Cause you could really tell that’s us.”
“So that’s how we came to pull the rarest prank of all…”
“The prank… for good.”
“Once again, that brings our story to its happy conclusion.”
“All right, okay. So, a long, long, long, long time ago…”
“Underpanty World was a peaceful planet where everybody wore only underwear.”
“Until, it started to blow up for some reason.”
“Meanwhile, the leaders of Underpanty World, Big Daddy Long Johns and his wife Princess Pantyhose saved their baby by stretching his underwear really far and then they shot him into space.”
“And then he crashed on earth and he was raised by some nice fi… Dolphins?”
“Okay, fine.”
“But, the space baby grew up fast.”

GEORGE Quotes on School Life and Pranks

“Lay low? Look at our fellow children. Look upon their sad, miserable, pathetic faces. Come on, Harold. If you won’t do it for me and you won’t do it for you… do it for future generations. Save the first graders… the kindygarteners, the unborn… from a life of eternal boredom!”
“Best.”
“What’s happening to his face?”
“What’s he doing here?”
“What? No!”
“This is too much. I mean, even for you.”
“Hey, hey. Calm down. It’s not the end of the world. We’ll still be best friends. Just way down the hall from each other. What am I talking about? This is bad. Long distance relationships never work!”
“Okay, you’re right. No, you are right. I mean, if we get put in separate classes, it’s the end of the world as we know it.”
“Oh, I’ll tell you what we’re gonna do. First thing Monday morning, we’re getting that turtle.”
“Yes, go! Please go.”
“Go, go, go.”
“Hello. If you would like the chance to win one billion dollars…”
“Please hold for one of our representatives.”
“It’s gotta be in here somewhere.”
“Whoa!”
“Everything Krupp ever confiscated from us.”
“My hypno-ring! I never even got to take it out of the wrapper.”
“Put the pen down, Mr. Krupp… or we’ll hypnotize you!”
“Forged from the molten plastic of Shandong, China. In the lowest floor of the darkest basement where only toy prizes dare be made, exists the most powerful items ever to be found in a box of Frosted Sugar Doodles, the Hypno-Ring.”
“When I snap my fingers, you will obey our every command.”
“You are now the greatest superhero of all time… the amazing Captain Underpants!”
“It worked!”
“Wait, no!”
“Why?”
“Yeah, we should probably go get him.”
“Captain Underpants, wait!”
“Okay, listen, let’s not be punching people, though, because…”
“What?”
“No.”
“Where’d he go now?”
“Found him.”
“We gotta do something. I’ve got an idea.”
“Morning.”
“No!”
“Wait! No! Follow that gorilla!”
“Yeah! You are so good at operating a crane, Harold.”
“Yes!”
“That’s it! Now we know what turns him back and forth.”
“We should probably stop.”
“Okay, this is the street. Come on, come on. We’re almost there.”
“Drop it. No, get off. Gimme! That’s a bad dog.”
“There’s probably wild dogs in there.”
“Rabid rats.”
“Jars of plucked-out eyeballs.”
“Why’d you scream?”
“We probably shouldn’t snoop around.”
“Come on.”
“It’s impossible. That would never happen.”
“Which will never happen.”
“It’ll never happen. ‘Cause we control him now. And if ever gives us any trouble again, all we gotta do is snap our fingers… and “Tra-la-laa!” All of our problems go away.”
“Hey, Tommy. What’s going on?”
“No, you didn’t.”
“I don’t see a signature. Harold, do you see a signature?”
“See? Problem solved.”
“Quick, in here.”
“Definitely. Come on. Let’s turn him back into Krupp.”
“Yeah, well, we can’t have him wandering around looking like that.”
“Captain Underpants, get out here.”
“Come on. We’re almost there.”
“Principal Krupp. It’s time to go. Gotta wrap it up.”
“Now hold on. Let me see that resume. It says here that you were a genius inventor?”
“Oh, this is bad. We just hired a maniac for a science teacher!”
“No, no, no. You need to stay here. Okay, you’re the principal, remember?”
“Get rid of laughter?”
“I don’t like this. I mean, I don’t really understand it. But the stuff I am understanding seems genuinely bad to me.”

GEORGE Quotes on Captain Underpants

“Tra-la-laaa!”
“Yes and no. But mostly yes.”
“Morning.”
“No!”
“Wait! No! Follow that gorilla!”
“Yeah! You are so good at operating a crane, Harold.”
“Yes!”
“Well, don’t worry about that. There’s no more evil villains around here.”
“That’s it! Now we know what turns him back and forth.”
“We should probably stop.”
“Okay, this is the street. Come on, come on. We’re almost there.”
“Drop it. No, get off. Gimme! That’s a bad dog.”
“There’s probably wild dogs in there.”
“Rabid rats.”
“Jars of plucked-out eyeballs.”
“Why’d you scream?”
“We probably shouldn’t snoop around.”
“Come on.”
“It’s impossible. That would never happen.”
“Which will never happen.”
“It’ll never happen. ‘Cause we control him now. And if ever gives us any trouble again, all we gotta do is snap our fingers… and “Tra-la-laa!” All of our problems go away.”
“Hey, Tommy. What’s going on?”
“No, you didn’t.”
“I don’t see a signature. Harold, do you see a signature?”
“See? Problem solved.”
“Quick, in here.”
“Definitely. Come on. Let’s turn him back into Krupp.”
“Yeah, well, we can’t have him wandering around looking like that.”
“Captain Underpants, get out here.”
“Come on. We’re almost there.”
“Principal Krupp. It’s time to go. Gotta wrap it up.”
“Now hold on. Let me see that resume. It says here that you were a genius inventor?”
“Oh, this is bad. We just hired a maniac for a science teacher!”
“No, no, no. You need to stay here. Okay, you’re the principal, remember?”
“Get rid of laughter?”
“I don’t like this. I mean, I don’t really understand it. But the stuff I am understanding seems genuinely bad to me.”