Principal Krupp, the perpetually exasperated head of Jerome Horwitz Elementary School, provides a constant source of comedic relief in Captain Underpants: The First Epic Movie.
Humorous KRUPP Quotes
“George! Harold! What am I doing in your tree house again? You boys are in big trouble! I don’t know how big yet… Why does this keep happening?! Where are my clothes?! Where are they?!”
“Pretty sure I made the right choice. This morning’s school sign is supposed to read… ‘Sewage plant field trips are today.’ So, can either of you explain why it now reads… ‘Come see my hairy armpits’?!?”
“The proof is here. Inside my gut.”
“Nice try. Turtle and I have grown quite attached. We’re inseparable, actually. I carry him wherever I go. Including the shower!”
“Oh, will I? I’ll get sleepy? With that thing pointing at me? It’s not making me sleepy. I’m not gonna get sleepy from… Whoa!”
“Where am I? Where are my pants?”
“Why am I soaking wet?”
“Didn’t know I could do this.”
“What are you two doing together?”
“What? I could have sworn I signed that thing. No matter. There! Officially separated. Forever!”
““Do you want to go on a date?” A date?! “Love, Edith.””
“Edith, the lunch lady.”
“Well, I had to go all out for m’lady.”
“Waiter! Check please!”
“Mm… It smells spicy.”
KRUPP Quotes on Rules and Order
“I’ve told you two a thousand times not to draw these idiotic comics!”
“In my office… NOW!”
“It was a choice between the magnetic automatic door closer and the music and arts programs.”
“I know you two are responsible.”
“Ever since you attended this elementary school, you’ve been responsible for one prank after another.”
“Augh! For four long years… you two have been disrupting the carefully calibrated, drone-like beehive… that this elementary school is supposed to be. I may not be able to prove it yet… but I’m gonna get you two one day. One day very, very soon.”
“Get out of my office.”
“Attention, everyone. Principal Krupp here with an announcement. This Saturday is the mandatory Invention Convention.”
“You must be here with your inventions at 8:00 am.”
“I know that’s early for Saturday, but don’t worry. You should be done by 9:00… pm.”
“Is this thing on? Quick announcement. Our science teacher, Mr. Fyde, is no longer with us.”
“What? No! Not like that. He wanted to spend Saturday with his family, so I fired him! I’ll find a replacement next week. On to Melvin Sneedly with the first of his 16–“
“17 inventions. Take it away, Melvin.”
“Huh? Oh… Melvin, turn that thing off.”
“Oh, boys! A moment, please.”
“Melvin.”
“You see, Melvin is yet to demonstrate his most impressive invention from today. It was a little extracurricular project I asked him to come up with myself.”
“Oh, Melvin. How fun. Let’s see what it recorded.”
“Yes, yes. Well done, Melvin. Extra credit granted.”
“I told you I would get you one day. And that day I was talking about is this day. Today. This is the day.”
“No. Your parents are obviously total failures. I have a much more effective punishment in mind. Because I’m going to have you two placed in separate… classes. I’m going to annihilate your friendship.”
“You see? You won’t be together. You won’t be able to enjoy each other’s company and ruin my life.”
“Enjoy the rest of your weekend, boys. Because come Monday…”
“Well, if it isn’t George Beard and Harold Hutchins. To what do I owe the pleasure? Is it perhaps this?”
“Oh, what’s this? Why, it’s the paperwork to separate you two.”
“It’s really incredible that I can actually see the end of their friendship. And it ends right here. On this… dotted line.”
KRUPP Quotes on Comics
“Well, I read them… and considering they’re completely implausible, juvenile… and filled with the lowest form of wit… potty humor… they’re actually pretty funny. See ya later!”
KRUPP Quotes on Personal Life
“No! What? That’s none of your business! But, if you must know… yeah, I actually do. By the way, I was tidying up my office and I believe these belong to you…”
“Edith!”
“No, no. I’m just finishing up. What brings you around here?”
“I don’t know what that means, but it sounds very time-consuming.”
“Well, I should probably get back to running the school. You know, it’s not gonna run itself.”
“Wait, Edith! You never gave me the tuna casserole.”